 I know Jesus Christ died for my sins, and that's all I really need to know. |
| The New York Times editorial page is like a Ouija board that has only three answers, no matter what the question. The answers are: higher taxes, more restrictions on political speech and stricter gun control. |
| Liberals become indignant when you question their patriotism, but simultaneously work overtime to give terrorists a cushion for the next attack and laugh at dumb Americans who love their country and hate the enemy. |
| The Democrats have no actual policy proposals of their own unless constant carping counts as a policy. |
| Usually the nonsense liberals spout is kind of cute, but in wartime their instinctive idiocy is life-threatening. |
| Democrats always assure us that deterrence will work, but when the time comes to deter, they're against it. |
| We've finally given liberals a war against fundamentalism, and they don't want to fight it. They would, except it would put them on the same side as the United States. |
| We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity. We weren't punctilious about locating and punishing only Hitler and his top officers. We carpet-bombed German cities; we killed civilians. That's war. And this is war. |
| If John Kerry had a dollar for every time he bragged about serving in Vietnam - oh wait, he does. |
| Whether they are defending the Soviet Union or bleating for Saddam Hussein, liberals are always against America. They are either traitors or idiots, and on the matter of America's self-preservation, the difference is irrelevant. |
| They've hit us and we've got to hit back hard, and I'm not just talking about the terrorists. |
| I love to engage in repartee with people who are stupider than I am. |
| When we were at peace, Democrats wanted to raise taxes. Now there's a war, so Democrats want to raise taxes. When there was a surplus, Democrats wanted to raise taxes. Now that there is a mild recession, Democrats want to raise taxes. |
| Liberal soccer moms are precisely as likely to receive anthrax in the mail as to develop a capacity for linear thinking. |
| Democrats couldn't care less if people in Indiana hate them. But if Europeans curl their lips, liberals can't look at themselves in the mirror. |
| While the form of treachery varies slightly from case to case, liberals always manage to take the position that most undermines American security. |
| I've decided to cut out the part of the speech where I say anything nice about Democrats. |
| We don't want someone who will get 98 percent of the vote. We want someone who will get 51 percent of the vote. |
| Whenever a liberal begins a statement with 'I don't know which is more frightening,' you know the answer is going to be pretty clear. |
| Taxes are like abortion, and not just because both are grotesque procedures supported by Democrats. You're for them or against them. Taxes go up or down; government raises taxes or lowers them. But Democrats will not let the words "abortion" or "tax hikes" pass their lips. |
