How strange, when your father's wearing women's clothes and platform shoes, that a pair of loafers looks incredible. |
I think I have a dark view of the world. I have to make everything funny, otherwise it all seems so sad. |
I peaked early. I was told I'd missed my boat. |
I spent most of my life locked in my bedroom, miserable about my raging acne. |
I've got a new relationship and I'm trapped in this old life. |
Every job I've ever gotten has been an accident. All the jobs I actually go after, I don't get. |
Your own experience keeps taking you towards something. My book adds the hope that it's a better something. |
My Dad was so open creatively that I was off in search of black turtleneck bathing suits with long sleeves. |
It occurred to me, when I was old enough to make rules of my own, that they should be fair and simple. |
I had a friend whose family had dinner together. The mother would tuck you in at night and make breakfast in the morning. They even had a spare bike for a friend. It just seemed so amazing to me. |
My parents were extremely generous. The people they would get to work for them might not have regular bathing habits, but they'd be good at wearing masking tape on their nipples. |
I'm totally convinced I can write the perfect pop song. |
I didn't have any concept of age or authority. I remember realising, Oh, the world has rules and we don't. |
My mother did literally hitchhike barefoot to the country store. |
I like to think of myself as a New Yorker, which is pathetic. |
Gag me with a spoon! |
Not many people know what their parents sound like having sex. It was noisy. |
We had two rules growing up in my house: If you're going to take a shower, do it with whomever you're dating so you don't waste water; and if you buy one for yourself, buy six, because everybody's going to want one. |
I grew up with too much freedom. You can't define yourself. |
The idea of licking stamps seemed great fun for me. |