 Confession is good for the soul only in the sense that a tweed coat is good for dandruff - it is a palliative rather than a remedy. |
| My father hated radio and could not wait for television to be invented so he could hate that too. |
| Let us hope, that a kind Providence will put a speedy end to the acts of God under which we have been laboring. |
| Murals in restaurants are on a par with the food in museums. |
| The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds - they mature slowly. |
| A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. |
| We must love one another, yes, yes, that's all true enough, but nothing says we have to like each other. |
| The rich aren't like us, they pay less taxes. |
| The murals in restaurants are on par with the food in museums. |
| When I can no longer bear to think of the victims of broken homes, I begin to think of the victims of intact ones. |
| I wanted to be bored to death, as good a way to go as any. |
| The universe is like a safe to which there is a combination. But the combination is locked up in the safe. |
| Pain is the question mark turned like a fishhook in the human heart. |
| Everybody hates me because I'm so universally liked. |
| The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another chance. |
| I write when I'm inspired, and I see to it that I'm inspired at nine o'clock every morning. |
| Celibacy is the worst form of self-abuse. |
| The value of marriage is not that adults produce children but that children produce adults. |
| Words fashioned with somewhat over precise diction are like shapes turned out by a cookie cutter. |
| We are not primarily put on this earth to see through one another, but to see one another through. |
