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Ogden Nash Quotes

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Ogden Nash
August 19, 1902 - May 19, 1971
Nationality: American
Category: Poet
Subcategory: American Poet

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker.


There are people who are very resourceful, at being remorseful, and who apparently feel that the best way to make friends is to do something terrible and then make amends.


Too clever is dumb.


I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.


The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late.


There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is to have either a clear conscience or none at all.


Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.


I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to disarm the man she was preparing to overwhelm.


I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance, Were it not for making a living, which is rather a nouciance.


A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.


People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.


The only people who should really sin are the people who can sin and grin.


Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.


Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.


Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.


Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?


The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat.


Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave when they think that their children are naive.


I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all.


Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying then without money?


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