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Groucho Marx Quotes

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Groucho Marx
October 2, 1895 - August 19, 1977
Nationality: American
Category: Comedian
Subcategory: American Comedian

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.


Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know.


Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.


I wish to be cremated. One tenth of my ashes shall be given to my agent, as written in our contract.


From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend reading it.


Humor is reason gone mad.


Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.


Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.


A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.


Women should be obscene and not heard.


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