 It's weird when people start sentences with 'frankly' - as if their other sentences don't count. |
| I don't want any vegetables, thank you. I paid for the cow to eat them for me. |
| There's nothing cure or funny or lovable about being cheap. It's a total turn-off. |
| You can only fall in love six times in your life. Choose wisely. |
| The modern economy isn't about the redistribution of wealth, it's about the redistribution of time. |
| If you don't have a spiritual practice in place when times are good, you can't expect to suddenly develop one during a moment of crisis. |
| When future archaeologists dig up the remains of California, they're going to find all of those gyms their scary-looking gym equipment, and they're going to assume that we were a culture obsessed with torture. |
| Brain research tells us that only twenty percent of human beings have a sense of irony, which means that eighty percent of the world takes everything at face value. |
| Christmas makes everything twice as sad. |
| Eagles are seagulls with a good hairdo. |
| I think the killers get far too much attention. |
| Sometimes the best lighting of all is a power failure. |
| A bland smile is like a green light at an intersection, it feels good when you get one, but you forget it the moment you're past it. |
| It's very strange that most people don't care if their knowledge of their family history only goes back three generations. |
| Florida isn't so much a place where one goes to reinvent oneself, as it is a place where one goes if one no longer wished to be found. |
| There's much to be said for feeling numb. Time passes more quickly. You eat less, and because numbness encourages laziness, you do fewer things, good or bad, and the world's probably a better place for it. |
| Quick. Name ten dead redheads. |
| What exactly is it that humans do that is specifically human? There has to be something. How odd it is for billions of people to be alive, yet not one of them is really quite sure of what makes people people. |
| When Donald Duck traded his wings for arms, was he trading up or trading down? |
| When you crop the photo, you tell a lie. |
